is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
