im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
