who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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