thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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