I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
