called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just had sex on a roof
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
