You don't have asthma, your pregnant
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
