If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
