I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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