What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
She bit a glass in half.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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