She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
