What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
