so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
