I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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