R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
