The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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