Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Randomize