At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize