So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
