u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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