you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
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