or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Randomize
