No more Irish car bombs ever.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
