pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
