is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
