Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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