Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize