We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize