i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
