apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
