The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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