some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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