His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
