literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
