so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
