He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize