YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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