oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Randomize
