you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
