I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
