I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
