I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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