I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
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