let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
