you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Let's paint friendship bongs
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize