SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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