he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
