Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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