found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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