Acid is not a monday night drug
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
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