Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize