I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
